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What's Next For Woods and His Family
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Updated: Sun 2/21/2010 7:50 am
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What was expected from Tiger Woods' first public comments since the world's greatest golfer went into virtual lock down varies from person to person. What was needed to be heard or thought deserved to be heard from Tiger varied equally as much in the court of public opinion. So you may be in the camp looking for more, or anxious to get past the circus that has become Tiger's life and more interested in seeing him back on the golf course. Regardless which side of the fence you are on, one thing is for sure - this is only the beginning.
It's the beginning of a period of self reflection that will lead Tiger to his ultimate place in history. It's the beginning of a process that may ultimately define his legacy, not only in the sporting world but the legacy he leaves his behind for his children.
Tiger admitted he was undergoing inpatient treatment, of exactly what kind was left for us to assume. It's been reported that Tiger entered the Pine Grove Behavioral Health and Addiction Services Clinic in Mississippi receiving treatment for sex addiction, a disease which is being more understood by millions as a result of the spotlight Tiger has placed on this compulsion.
Sex addiction is marked not simply by poor decision-making in the face
of temptation, but also by a sense of powerlessness before one's own
compulsive behavior. There are many types of sex addicts, including
so-called sexual anorexics who avoid physical intimacy with their
partner and seek it out in fantasies or with others. Despite the
shortage of statistics, researchers agree that the vast majority of sex
addicts — over 90% — are men. Rob Weiss, founder and executive director
of the Sexual Recovery Institute in Southern California, estimates that
up to 5% of Americans deal with some form of sex addiction, though he
says there is no real way to know.
Rehab length varies from two-week outpatient seminars to inpatient
clinics that keep patients for up to six weeks, like the one where
Woods is staying. Treatment — to address both the addiction and its
underlying causes — involves a mix of one-on-one sessions, group
therapy and family counseling, with addicts and their partners
encouraged to participate in supplemental 12-step programs.
The first step in treatment of sexual addiction is a full evaluation of
a patient's history and any past trauma. "All the men I've worked with
— and I've worked with thousands of them over the years — have some
profound experience of abuse and/or neglect in childhood," says Weiss.
Without addressing the underlying sexual, physical or emotional trauma
that usually leads to addiction, there is little hope of ending it.
For as much credit as Earl Woods, Tiger's father, received for grooming his child phenom into the world's greatest golfer, one has to now question how much blame Earl should shoulder for where his son finds himself now. You see it with child actors and actresses, music entertainers and also in the world of sports. Young people tossed into the spotlight, far beyond what their maturity and intellect can embrace. Children acting beyond their age in a world they aren't prepared for. Sheltered from the personal development necessary to afford them the very foundation they need to rely on as they grow into the person they want to become.
Tiger spoke about needing to find better balance and regain his spirituality, which he said he lost sight of over the last several years. But has Tiger ever truly had balance? Has Tiger ever really been given the opportunity to become the person he wanted to be instead of living to meet, if not exceed, the expectations of his father and the public?
Which brings me to what's next for Tiger and his family. Tiger is undergoing rehabilitation and therapy in hopes of saving a marriage and his place in his children's lives. But is that the best thing for his children and his wife? Sure, therapy is needed regardless, that's obvious but it's also clear that Tiger isn't going to be able to provide a normal childhood for his daughter and son. He's begging the paparazzi to leave his family alone, but that's just not going to happen. It's Tiger himself that has endangered his family in a way that may already be unrecoverable. So what is the responsible thing to do? What is the unselfish act that can position his daughter and son so that they don't struggle to enjoy an upbringing where they can develop as people?
What get's lost in all of the transgressions and records that are waiting to be broken, is the fact that Tiger's actions and subsequent decisions are impacting lives of people that never asked for any of this. Let's hope Elin and the children get the support they need and space they need to grow beyond Tiger and beyond the negative impact the world's greatest golfer has had on their lives.
Listen to the full Tiger Statement - HERE
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